Skyline Fine Time: These Go To Eleven

January 21, 2024Leave a comment

large mural on featuring skyline of downtown Pittsburgh with large sun in sky — Sunny city. A mural featuring the skyline of downtown Pittsburgh on the side wall of the Starlite Lounge, Blawnox

One would think … well, this one would think a lot of things that don’t turn out to be anywhere close to reality. One would think we would have run out of babies by now—no one knows where they come from! And you’d think every square inch of human flesh would be tattoo’d by now, what with the prevalence of retail storefronts that administer ink.

As much as we’d like to ask the hard questions around chicken fingers and vaping, political candidates and exactly who thinks Fred Armisen needs to keep appearing on television screens, this post is about that most evergreen of Orbit topics—how, despite what one might think, we never run out of new renditions of the Pittsburgh skyline. They’re littered throughout the metro area with a frequency so dense most take them for granted. But what about the vigilant eyes of the Orbit? Don’t worry—we’re still looking out for you.

spray-painted mural including skyline of downtown Pittsburgh inside a bubble — Bubble city. No Names Pub, Lawrenceville

Here then is our latest collection—the eleventh in this series—of murals and store signage, handmade and professionally executed, all featuring downtown Pittsburgh’s familiar peaks: PPG Place, the Highmark Hypodermic, USX tower and the rest.

Until next year—and it will probably be pretty much exactly a year from now—keep your feet on the ground, and keep reaching for the skyline.

skyline of the city of Pittsburgh carved into wooden sign — Wooden city. Winthrop Community Garden, Oakland

hand-painted sign for pub with skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Gray city. The Brookline Pub, Brookline

mural of downtown Pittsburgh — Pretty city. Riverview Antiques, Cheswick

postal label drawn with skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Liquid city. Bloomfield

mosaic tiles depicting downtown Pittsburgh and an alligator — Gator city. Garfield

retail windows decorated with image of Pittsburgh skyline — Black & gold & dog & cat city. Tails of the Burgh, Verona

business sign with skyline of downtown Pittsburgh appearing grown from plants — Green city. River City Growers, Lawrenceville

sign for sports bar featuring skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Sports city. Game Time, Ambridge

sign for property management company featuring skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Key city. Citylife Property Management, Southside

business sign with downtown Pittsburgh and large ice cream cone — Ice cream city. Churn Ice Cream & Coffee, Southside

bar window decorated with silhouette of downtown Pittsburgh skyline — A well-lit, negative-space city. Archie’s, Southside

Sanitary city. Alcosan

Business Casual: Taking Stock When the Shop is Closed

October 22, 20231 Comment

shop window with handmade signs for items on sale and store hours — For 25 cent chips, you can’t *not* afford to shop at E&B Store, Bloomfield

sign taped in store window with message "Store closed due to short staff" — Store closed due to short staff. Garfield

hand-written sign in barber shop window reading "Closed until Tuesday for court stuff" — Closed until Tuesday for court stuff. Millvale

hand-written sign in barber shop window reading "See you Tuesday Guess Why"" — See you Tuesday Guess ? Why. Millvale

store hours posted in shop window with many hand alterations — Summer Hours. Cumberland, MD

retail store glass front doors with large signs reading "Shop Online" — Shop Online, Uniontown

handwritten sign in shop window apologizing for irregular hours — Our store hours are going to be off and on starting the week of Jan 16th. Wilkinsburg

shop door with manilla folder labeled "Closed til 4/10" — Closed til 4/10, Lawrenceville

garage door with handmade "closed February" sign — Closed February, Polish Hill

business hours with updates taped on glass — Manual override, Wilkinsburg

sign taped in store window with message "srrry closed" — Srrry Closed, Morgantown, WV

Martial Art: Getting Our Kicks with Karate Pics

October 8, 20232 Comments

hand-painted window at martial arts academy show figures in combat — Wu-Shuryu-Do The Flowing Way / Strike Force Karate Academy, Mt. Washington

Your author won’t pretend to know what Wu-Shuryu-Do—The Flowing Way is, but it sure sounds cool. That said, a picture is worth a thousand words and what we don’t know by name, we sure get with the accompanying artwork.

The scene: two buff fighters are flexing and straining in combat. On the right is a warrior dressed like so many kung fu movie villains—shirtless, but with arm braces, wearing tight black trousers with the legs wrapped in some type of binding fabric. A thick red sash is worn about the waist with the end dangling for jaunty effect.

painting of people in karate poses on glass windows, Pittsburgh, PA — Wu-Shuryu-Do The Flowing Way, Mt. Washington

His foe is literally flying through the air with a leg extended in a kick that could surely split stone. This one didn’t skimp on the wardrobe on the way to the fight, though. He’s in a Tom Jones-style combat singlet accented with a necklace of oversized beads or baubles. A decorative toque literally tops the outfit in a style that would look equally smart on the ski slopes or the runway.

And can we say, what a location for mano a mano! We hope these guys can pause for a minute between bone-crackings to take in the view. Right behind their sweaty hindsides lies a breathtaking waterfall pooling into a misty river running between rocky peaks and twisting trees. If you’re looking for an Instaworthy place to have your neck snapped, The Flowing Way has got the place.

window painting for karate school with stylized punching fist, Pittsburgh, PA — Wu-Shuryu-Do The Flowing Way, (since replaced) Mt. Washington

Not all martial academies (are these dojos?) are as invested in the arts as Wu-Shuryu-Do. The Mt. Washington storefront studio has extended the custom window art to other panes of its Southern Ave. location.

Enough of them are, though, that original art decorating—and dramatizing—karate schools and Tang Soo Do meeting spots is a legitimate thing. Sure, it’s a little bit frightening and you’ve going to need expert timing, but we hope the trend continues as long as the river flows and the grasshopper learns from the cobra.

mural of figure in martial arts gown breaking cinder blocks — unknown, Wilkinsburg

mural of two people in karate poses painted on black brick wall, Wilkinsburg, PA — unknown, Wilkinsburg

painting of karate student breaking a brick with his bare hand in window with trophies — Nam’s Korean Karate School, Mt. Lebanon

doors for karate school with hand-painted figures making high kicks — Nam’s Korean Karate School, Mt. Lebanon

hand-painted wooden sign for martial arts organization — World Tang Soo Do Assoc., Tyrone

window glass mural of man throwing two others in martial arts combat, Etna, PA — Aikido of Pittsburgh, Etna

window signage for Battleground Training Center featuring silhouettes of two figures wrestling — Battleground Training Center, where “iron sharpens iron.” Vandergrift

door for martial arts academy with hand-painted dragon — Academy of Martial Arts, Arnold

sign for Taekwondo USA Family Center with man performing flying kick — Taekwondo USA Family Center, Vandergrift (detail)

Syntax Collector: A Quote-Unquote “Good Time”

September 17, 20233 Comments

hand-written help wanted sign using quotation marks for emphasis — This one’s got it all: quotation marks, underlining, arrows attacking from both sides. “Experienced” “Pizza Maker” “Needed” Lawrenceville

You know the gesture: the index and middle fingers of both hands, curled and twitching, are held aloft to either side of the speaker’s head. She or he is mid-rant, raving about one indignity or another—or possibly neck-deep in a story whose punchline is yet to be revealed.

Air quotes may be used in a variety of scenarios. For anyone who has ever deployed or received them in (hopefully-joking) sarcasm, the quote gesticulation can only be read as an opposite, a negation of the word being quoted.

Did you really “write” all these “songs?” or He says he’s the “voice” of a “generation.” or I’d “love” to see your “band,” but I have … anything else to do.

Keep Out sign with odd quotation marks — My kid could make that. Antique “Art Work.” Canonsburg

In this context, it’s impossible to read a hand-written sign warning Antique “art work” keep out! or advertising “Breakfast” served all day without seeing the humor in it. How bad could this art work be? If it’s not breakfast, what are they serving all day?

cemetery cenotaph with quotation marks used for emphasis — Who’s your daddy? “Parents of.” St. Nicholas Cemetery, Reserve Twp.

As the son of English professor and an avid reader, I’m well familiar with the “correct” use of English grammar. Misused quotes (or apostrophes, there/their/they’re, etc.) pop out immediately as jarring pot holes on the road to smooth reading. I know they’re technically wrong.

But as someone who loves the fluidity of ever-evolving language, it’s fascinating that so many English speakers—at least, English writers and readers—think of quotation marks as symbols of emphasis.

Like other after-market language tweaks derived to fill a void, I think it’s because we don’t really have a great way to express emphasis in handwriting. Sure you can underline and if you’ve got a design bent, maybe you’ll make the important words larger or double the ink to make it read heavier, but most of the computer-assisted tools to achieve this in text—italics and bold type—are a lot harder to execute with pen and paper.

handmade tribute poster to fire fighters with odd quotation marks — The Sounds That Blair At Night. “Let Us Honor” Our Fire Fighters. Lawrenceville

There are two kinds of people… maxims are painfully reductive, but it feels like quotation marks really do exist in one of two completely separate grammatical lives, depending on the writer/reader. To treat quotes as emphasis is a language hack that looks goofy to some of us and reads as completely normal to others. I’m “O.K.” with that.

Handmade tribute to American armed services in row house window — To the or not to the. “To The” Army, Navy, Marines, Coastguard, Air Force. Lawrenceville

hand-written note for delivery person using quotation marks for emphasis — The postman always rings twice. “Delivery Person.” Lawrenceville

sign in shop window using quotation marks for emphasis — No food or drink or on cell phones “permitted” in this store. Ambridge

hand-drawn address marker on brick wall — “Apt 2 in back”! (in the back). Bloomfield

sign for restaurant with quotation marks used for emphasis — How many Frans? “FRANS.” Donora

handmade sign on chainlink fence using quotation marks for emphasis — Come on in! “NO” Tress PASS. Troy Hill

handmade sign looking to buy collectibles with quotation marks used for emphasis — Don’t call us, we’ll call you. “CALL” 724-797… Ambridge

Jesus statue in antique store with hand-written sales tag — The one-finger salute. Giving “Blessing” Hand Position, Canonsburg

sidewalk chalk board advertising breakfast — You are what you eat. “Breakfast” served all day. Lawrenceville

handmade note to package carriers with odd quotation marks — Wink-wink, nudge-nudge. All “UPS” Packages to Back Porch. Lawrenceville

plywood with spray-painted message — NO “DUMPING” WOOD AT ALL. Lawrenceville

We All Scream

June 18, 20231 Comment

large plastic light in shape of soft-serve ice cream cone, Pittsburgh, PA — The unknown cone, Little Italy Days, Bloomfield

metal sign for Whippy Dip ice cream shop — Whippy Dip, Erie

cartoon-like mural of smiling ice cream cone — Twister on Mon, Glassport

worn sign for Dari-Delite ice cream shop — Dari-Delite, Swissvale

large image of ice cream cone with small military figures saluting, Honesdale, PA — Salute the cone. unknown, Honesdale

exterior of ice cream shop with silhouettes of soft-serve ice cream cones, Ambridge, PA — Ice Cream Therapy, Ambridge

three plastic soft-serve ice cream cones on roof line, Pittsburgh, PA — Twisters, Bloomfield (note: these ornamental cones were removed some time ago)

large sign for ice cream shop with broken neon — Miller Ave. Soft Serve & Dee-lites, Clairton

soft-serve ice cream cone sign, West Elizabeth, PA — Johnny’s Drive-In, West Elizabeth

stylized ice cream cone window art for ice cream shop — Sugar Spell Scoop, Sharpsburg

ice cream shop signage with large cone in sun and shade — Two scoops: half sun, half shade, Berkeley Springs, WV

faded "ghost sign" for ice cream parlor — Ghost sign, Rieck’s Ice Cream, Wilkinsburg

Skyline Fine Time: At Ten, An All-U-Can-Eat Buffet of Downtown Pittsburgh

February 26, 2023Leave a comment

mural of people in vestments praying with skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Holy City. A mural featuring the skyline of downtown Pittsburgh, Homewood

Man, I hope you came ready to eat.

It’s been a been more than a year since The Orbit served up its last over-the-top feast of all things skyline-shaped, themed, printed, and painted, so you have a right to be hungry.

And O! What a meal we’ve prepared for the skyline-starved today! Murals with downtown Pittsburgh as both star and supporting player. Business signage to either boast one’s 412 bona fides or pander to us yokels from a corporate office far, far away. Hand-created tributes as extracurricular activity spray painted onto bicycle paths and inked onto city steps railings.

mural with view of downtown Pittsburgh skyline — The city with a disembodied foot: mural, Perry Hilltop

All that—and more—awaits diners at this all-u-can-eat buffet of bridges, The Point, Steel Tower, PPG, and the rest. Grab a fork and knife, don’t waste your time on rolls—those are for suckers—and dig into a legitimate, if figurative, smorgasbord of Your Favorite City™ put on the pedestal it deserves … or, at least, thinks it deserves when it’s not too down on itself.

If somehow you’re still hungry for more, you can always go back to skyline stories one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine part 1 and 2, you know, just to tide you over.

colorful mural of downtown Pittsburgh rendered in cubist style — Cubist City: mural, Love Pittsburgh, Strip District

mural of downtown Pittsburgh awash with river water — Flood City: mural, Ketchup City, Sharpsburg

mural in arcade including downtown Pittsburgh skyline with cartoon zombies — Undead City: mural, Zombieburgh, Monroeville Mall

mural including many musicians and skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Music City: mural (detail), Homewood

mural on side of row house featuring shoe designer and downtown Pittsburgh — Shoe City: mural, Mexican War Streets, North Side

painting of downtown Pittsburgh skyline with sparkles — Sparkle City: The Color Park, South Side

mural for coffee shop with skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Pittsburgh: where the coffee flows like a tidal wave. Adda Coffee, Garfield

painting of downtown Pittsburgh skyline hung on sagging canvas in warehouse — Sagging City: mural, Art All Night 2022

pen drawing of downtown Pittsburgh skyline drawn on handrail for public steps — Step City: handrail drawing, Polish Hill

barber shop sign including skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — ‘Do City: Pittsburgh Cuts & Styles, Wilkinsburg

mural in shop window including skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Green City: Patagonia, Shadyside

sign for gym featuring stylized image of downtown Pittsburgh — It’s 9:10 somewhere. Downtown Pittsburgh plus the old Duquesne Brewery clock, Crossfit Athletics, South Side

electrician's van with image of skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Emerald City: Emerald Electrical Services van

electrician's van decorated with stylized silhouette of downtown Pittsburgh skyline — Electric City: A to Z Quality Electric

Iconic City … at least we hope this is a super-stylized image of The Point and downtown buildings and not something more sinister

label for handmade soap including downtown Pittsburgh with bubbles and rubber ducky — Bubble City: Up in Suds Soap

beer sign with downtown Pittsburgh in faux-neon — Buy-a-Lady-a-Drink City: Stella Artois beer sign

retail sign including skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Paradise City: Winner’s Paradise, Wilkinsburg

A city with high heels and rubber balls: Steel City Kickers League, Lawrenceville

business sign with silhouette of downtown Pittsburgh skyline — River (Trail) City: River Trail Cafe, North Side

window decal with silhouette of downtown Pittsburgh skyline — Food City: Pittsburgh Restaurant Week office, North Side

sign for Pittsburgh neighborway with skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — This is why we can’t have nice things. PGH DOMI neighborway signage, Lawrenceville

Paws Across Pittsburgh, Tarentum

sign for retail store including skyline of downtown Pittsburgh — Sideways City: Cohen’s Collectibles & More, Regent Square

Maybe It’s a Sign? Considering Mystery Signs

July 17, 2022Leave a comment

sign nailed to tree reading "Barber School?" — Pretty sure that’s *not* a barber school, but now we have to question everything. A mystery sign in Kilbuck Township

So many questions! One chunk of wood nailed to another is attached to the outside of a residential garage. Next to the wood hangs a length of braided twine with a sharp nail at the end. The wood is painted with a cryptic message: Its for my bac but by a man’s hand.

Bac may or may not have been cut off—or misspelled. Is it for the back? What is it—the nail on the string? Does this serve a real purpose—that’s hard to imagine—or is it entirely symbolic? Assuming the latter, the message is lost on me. Maybe it’s a Biblical or cultural reference your heathen author just doesn’t get?

It’s the very definition of a mystery sign—a public notice set out for the world to consume but not entirely clear what the message is or who it’s meant for.

small sign on cinderblock wall reading "It's for my bac... but by a man's hand." — “Its for my bac… but by a man’s hand.” The Run

large roadside sign saying "No quid pro quo" — “No quid pro quo.” Duquesne

With some signs the mystery may not be that great but they’re still worth review and inclusion. We may assume the No quid pro quo sign [photo above]—photographed in Duquesne during some of the former guy’s obvious quid pro quo activity—is the work of one of the ex-president’s supporters expressing an opinion … but it still looks way goofy absent any other context.

Anyone who travels Babcock Blvd. in the summer knows the corn guys by Hastings Hardware, but still, seeing a lone day-glow CORN SOON sign [below] just feels like a cruel taunt. Found glasses [below] suggests someone did exactly that … but not any way to return the lost item to its rightful owner.

Handmade sign on utility pole reading "Corn Soon" — But when will there be corn NOW? “CORN SOON.” North Hills

hand-written sign with drawing of eyeglasses and text "Found glasses" — “Found glasses.” Lawrenceville

sign in front yard with spray-painted message "Who is John Galt?" — I don’t know—you tell me! “Who is John Galt?” Stanton Heights

Others aren’t so obvious. Who is John Galt? [above] has an easily Googleable explanation, but it doesn’t explain why a Stanton Heights homeowner feels the need to decorate their front yard with this message.

A chain link fence in a Bloomfield alley hosts an odd specimen. No violins, the sign declares, along with a fine folksy painting of the instrument, no crying, no crying [below]. We like to think violins are purely metaphor here—that crying is the only real objection—but where’s that coming from? Not a creature was stirring when the picture was snapped, but perhaps it rains with teardrops of a thousand tortured toddlers at other times of day.

hand-painted sign with violin and text "No violins, no crying" — Cellos only. “No violins. No crying. No crying.” Bloomfield

Every one of these gems has a story and it’s likely we won’t find out the explanations to any of them—and that’s OK. With the number of messages we humans push out to the world every single day, I’ll take mystery over hate, exploitation, cruelty, or narcissism any time. Wondering ain’t such a bad thing. Plus, like the sign says, … And that’s life … right?

Sign on utility pole reading "Street continues around corner." — Perhaps the most Pittsburgh sign ever. “Street continues around corner.” Troy Hill

hand-painted sign on utility pole reading "Slow kid playin" — “Slow kid playin.” Millvale

wooden board with cryptic symbols painted on it nailed to utility poles — Runes, Oakland

wooden sign nailed to utility pole with hand-painted message "CJ's Spot" — “CJ’s Spot.” Hill District

cardboard sign in window of home reading "Someone else removed the stop work order." — Sure they did. “Someone else removed the stop work order.” Spring Garden

hand-written sign in Zip-Loc bad stapled to utility pole — “Psalm 91 over this neighborhood.” North Side

mirror in front yard of home with message "Please do turn around here." — Vampires, you’re on your own. “Please do turn around here.” The Run

handwritten sign in hot dog shop window reading "We are completely out of chili ... sorry." — If only every restaurant was as up front about their chili status. “We are completely out of chili … sorry.” Frankie’s, Lawrenceville

empty aluminum serving trays in deli display case with Post-It note reading "Not for consumption. Only for religion purpose." — “Not for consumption. Only for religion purpose.” Scranton

Handmade sign reading "JACK" — You don’t know Jack. “JACK.” Lawrenceville

color printout of cat stapled to utility pole — Cat, just a cat. Spring Garden

pair of doors in brick building, one of which has handmade sign reading "ACES" — “ACES.” Vandergrift

hand-painted sign on utility pole reading "NO OUTLET" — “NO OUT LET.” Millvale

white paper taped to cinderblock wall with no text remaining — A mystery [blank/sunbleached] sign among mystery signs! Lawrenceville

hand-written sign left by highway — “Sun Ra / Alice Coltrane. I miss my friends …” Millvale

handmade wooden sign with section missing attached to utility pole — What was here before the middle went missing? Polish Hill/Strip District

plastic butterfly and small sign reading "... and that's life" on cinderblock wall — It sure is. “… and that’s life.” The Run

No Dogs Wasted Here: Dog Police, Part Deux Deux

February 6, 20224 Comments

no dog poop message spray painted on wood covering garage door — Think of the children! *No dog poop. Kids walk to school here.* A warning message from The Dog Police, on patrol in Wilmerding

Stuck to the aluminum siding of a little house up the hill in Millvale, a set of peel-and-stick letters spells out a curious message: No dogs wasted here.

Is this a rehab clinic for hooched pooches? An embetterment program for down-on-their luck pups? A recycling center for man’s-best-friends at their wits-last-ends?

sticker letters on siding reading "no dogs wasted here" — *No dogs wasted here.* Millvale

Of course not! Don’t be ridiculous! Diligent Orbit staff know when The Dog Police are on patrol, keeping the streets, alleys, and—especially—residential trash receptacles safe from the terror of incoming canine caca. Foreign or domestic, but always unwanted, Fido’s doo-doo and Scout’s dishonor are a deeply divisive feature of the pedestrian experience.

Having neither a mutt to strut nor publicly-available trash can, your author—excuse the expression—doesn’t have a dog in this fight, so we’re but mere spectators from the cheap seats as the daily doggo drama plays itself out just about everywhere.

hand-written signs on garbage can to stop putting dog shit in cans — *Stop asshole no shit in my cans / Dont put your dogs *shit* in my* *cans.* Lawrenceville

What’s the right thing to do?

The responsible pet-owner takes their furry friends out for daily constitutionals, lets them sniff all the fire hydrants and boxwood hedges they care to, and picks up the droppings inevitably jettisoned from their mutts’ butts right there on the sidewalks and grassy patches along the way. Do we expect the human companions to carry the scat sachet all the way home? Or are public/city trash cans an acceptable end point for the excrement?

Alternately, the home owner doesn’t want to deal with that (quite literal) crap—either on the sidewalk or in their street-facing waste bins. It doesn’t make a lot of sense—it’s just trash, right?—but people feel a sense of violation when anyone uses their bins, and when that trash is dog shit—that’s where it gets ugly—and smelly.

hand-written sign on utility pole saying "Pick up after your pups poops" — *Pick up after your pups poops.* Dravosburg

Like certain other ages-old, inconsolable rifts, it’s unlikely the poop-scoop-and-scoot crowd will ever reach a peaceful accord with the all-volunteer dog police, but we can dream.

Until then, please curb your dog, no peeing on the plants, use the trash can across the street, and make sure none of your possessives or contractions include apostrophes.

"No dogs" sign in front of large garden — Forget the poop, some dog police go straight to the root of the problem. *NO DOGS.* Millvale

message to keep dog poop cleaned-up on parking sign — Semi-official-looking dog police. *Keep you dog shit … cleaned up.* Lawrenceville

"No animal waste" handmade sign in front garden — Not into species-shaming dog police. *No animal waste.* Lawrenceville

handmade sign in front yard to not let dogs do their business — Gender-inclusive dog police. *Do not let your dog do their business ((here)).* Highland Park

message hung from tree limb to not let dogs pee on grass — Think of the children! (again) *Kids on the block play here, please do not let your dog go potty.* Lawrenceville

handmade sign to clean up dog droppings — *Clean up dog droppings.* Bloomfield

hand-written sign on gate asking owners to stop their dogs from shitting — *Please stop *your* dog from shitting on my property!!! Thats very inconsiderate of you.* Stanton Heights

hand-painted stone with message "Please curb your dog" — Dog cop rock. *Please curb your dog.* Millvale

foam pad with message "no peeing on the plants" written — *No peeing on the plants.* Lawrenceville

message to clean up doog poop in stickers on side of house — *Have a bag clean your dog — poop*, Millvale

street sign with owner scooping dog poop — Drop cops, from the butts of mutts. Etna

pumpkin lawn sign with message to keep dogs off lawn — The dog police, all decorated for fall. *Please keep dogs off my lawn.* Munhall [photo: Lee Floyd]

cinderblock wall with "no dogs" stenciled — *No dogs.* (Just smile) Millvale

sign across row house airway reading "no dog poop" — The dog police at the end of the tunnel. *No Dog Poop*. Polish Hill

handmade sign to keep dogs out of yard — *Keep dogs out of yard!! Thank you.* East Liberty

egg carton with "no dogs please" written on it — If you bring your dog around, start carton their poop home with you. *No dogs please.* Lawrenceville

message to clean up dog poop taped to front door of house — *Hey! Please use the trash can across the street instead of our storefront for your dog poop.* Thx. Lawrenceville

message taped to garbage can saying "no poop bags" — *No poop bags in my garbage cans. Thank you*. Lawrenceville

message about dog poop bags use written on styrofoam plate — *Please do not leave ‘green’ poop bags on trails or throw off trails. Dispose all poop bags properly.* *Thank You.* Frick Park

hand-written signs in house front windows asking for owners to pick up their dogs' poop — *Smile you’re on camera / Please pick up your dog’s poop. Free bags below.* Lawrenceville

message to clean up dog poop on chain link fence — *It is your job as the dog owner and not mine as the homeowner to clean up after you and your dog… Be respectful of other homes.* Larimer

See also: “The Scoop on Poop or Hill Street Doo Doos: On Patrol with the Dog Police” (Pittsburgh Orbit, Sept. 22, 2019)

Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop: Stop Signs with Bonus Lines

June 20, 20212 Comments

stop sign with added sign reading "Call your mom," Pittsburgh, PA — STOP! Call your mom … unless you don’t get along with your mom and then maybe you should just keep on going. Altered stop sign, Bloomfield.

It is one of the more iconic images we see every day on nearly every corner in the built landscape. Bold, red, and shaped into a perfect octagon, outlined with a white border, the sign has the simple, impossible-to-misconstrue message: STOP.

But, as these things go, they don’t always carry only that text. Pranksters and jokesters, the graffiti-addled and social justice-minded have taken the (traffic) law into their own hands hither and yon. Their doctored stop signs take the familiar to the absurd and hopefully give us a laugh or a ponderable notion while we apply the brakes and look both ways.

Stop sign alterations are so common that mass-produced white-on-red stickers are available for just this purpose. We included a couple examples of these (see STOP the Trump Kleptocracy and STOP elder neglect, below), but The Orbit generally considers these “corporate sign-jacking” that isn’t nearly as interesting as the bespoke variety.

There’s really not much more to say on this topic, so now we’re just going to …

stop sign altered to read "Stop in the name of love" — A supreme alteration. STOP! In the name of love I. Highland Park

stop sign with letters added reading "in the name of love," Pittsburgh, PA — Think it over. STOP! In the name of love II. Bloomfield [note the bonus protractor]

stop sign altered to read "Don't Stop Believing" — Every Journey has to stop somewhere. Don’t STOP Believing. Lawrenceville

stop sign with graffiti addition of "the pig," Pittsburgh, PA — STOP the pig. Just one pig, though. Friendship

stop sign altered to read "Stop Rad City" — Where is Rad City and why do we need to stop it? STOP Rad City. Friendship

stop ahead sign with added extra sign reading "free range children" — STOP (ahead): free range children, Shadyside

stop sign with added sticker to read "Stop elder neglect" — STOP elder neglect. Spring Garden

stop sign altered to read "Please stop Trump" — Done, sort of. Please STOP Trump. Homestead

stop sign with added sticker to read "Stop the Trump kleptocracy" — STOP the Trump kleptocracy. North Side

stop sign altered to read "Stop killing" — Less killing, more living. STOP killing. East Liberty

stop sign with added text "... hatin'" — Less hatin’, more lovin’. STOP hatin’! South Side

stop sign with added text "I love you" — STOP! I love you. We love you, too. Friendship

The Tooth Shall Set You Free! Dental Art, Part 2

January 26, 2020Leave a comment

mural painted on brick wall for Smiles by Hart dentist office including Pittsburgh imagery, toothbrushes, toothpaste, and the banner message "Brush, Floss & Be Happy"

Brush, Floss & Be Happy, Smiles by Hart mural by Tim Engelhardt, North Oakland

We watched it go up, day-by-day over a couple weeks in November. The new mural, painted by artist Tim Engelhardt on the brick wall of Smiles by Hart’s Centre Ave. office, appeared like an Orbit photo fantasy. It’s got a little bit of everything: sports team logos, greatest hits from the Pittsburgh skyline, a trio of red Valentine’s Day hearts, floating red lips, and the not-quite-what-you-were-looking-for life advice to Brush, Floss & Be Happy.

While the new painting fits all these categories, the most powerful graphic expression comes from the dentist’s office-specific inclusion of a dozen toothbrushes and half as many oozing tubes of what appear to be cadmium white oil paint … but in this context, we can probably assume as toothpaste.

The whole collection is set just so, arranged to form the meta image of a pair of giant disembodied wings. The painting seems to suggest that through a healthy regimen of dental hygiene, we may all be lifted into the aether. The tooth, the mural seems to say, shall set you free.

orthodontist sign with stylized images of teeth straightening, Richard J. Dahar, Avalon, PA

Pop art orthodontist: Richard J. Dahar, D.M.D., Avalon

Who knew? Lurking amongst the quaint, prewar housing, protestant churches, and discount retail in the near western suburbs lies a hotbed of the dental arts. Mere blocks from each other along Bellevue/Avalon’s main drag, reside four different professional offices engaged in a kind-of arms race of the teeth.

The sign for orthodontist Richard J. Dahar’s Avalon office (above) features a four-panel sequence of technicolor abstracted lips, teeth, and braces that clearly apes the super-saturated, square-format repetition of Andy Warhol’s silkscreens.

Just down the road, Bellevue Dental Associates have opted for a more classical design featuring the odd image of five figures engaged in what feels like a pagan ritual (below). The multi-color people hold hands to form a wide ring surrounding a bulbous tooth the size of a Hyundai. While a regular visit to one’s dentist is certainly good practice, this level of tooth worship may be taking it too far.

ornate sign for Bellevue Dental Associates with people forming ring around giant tooth

Ring around the root canal: Bellevue Dental Assoc.

dentist sign with stylized teeth in multiple colors, Bellevue, PA

Micucci can clean dirty teeth, but not dirty minds. Micucci Family Dentistry, Bellevue

Blue tooth: John Debonis, D.M.D., Bellevue

Beyond greater Bellevue, we located some more of the themes we explored in part 1: glowing, neon tooth outlines, giant graphic silhouettes, abstracted gestural teeth, and one kid-friendly, colorful teeth-cleaning collage.

front window for dentist James M. Eiben with large neon tooth

Neon tooth: James M. Eiben, D.M.D., South Side

neon sign with large tooth for Beaver Dental Arts, Beaver, PA

Neon tooth, too: Beaver Dental Arts

Smile! That’s an order! Advanced Dentistry, Oakdale

Silver filling: Three Rivers Endodontics, East Liberty

Sometimes it can feel like a grim world out there–and no one likes going to the dentist–but hats off to all the dental artists making the world a little more colorful, neon-lit, and, yes, toothy. “Brush, floss, and be happy” may not end up a Bobby McFerrin lyric, but there are worse credos to base one’s life on.

Brungo Dentistry, West View

See also: Incisor Edition: Dental Art (part 1), Pittsburgh Orbit, Aug. 5, 2018.

Pittsburgh Orbit

Around every corner, a new phenomenon

Tag: signs