Both Sidings Now: Mixed-Media Houses

July 31, 20221 Comment

house with fake brick siding patched with many different types of shingles — The Sistine Chapel of mixed-media DIY home repair. Etna

With apologies to Joni Mitchell,

I’ve looked at life with both sidings now
Fake stone, fake brick, anyhow
Clapboard slats and fish scale tile
Colored vinyl—go on for miles

Call it what you like—brick collage bricolage or asphalt aspirations, vinyl verité or aluminum assemblage. We’re going the refer to the unique phenomena of homes improved in multiple phases with multiple different exterior building materials as mixed-media houses.

side-view of row house exterior made up of many different building materials — Slanted and enchanted. Mixed-media with ghost house. Lawrenceville

However it worked out, there are a lot of Pittsburgh homes—specifically row houses—that ended up with an upstairs/downstairs division in after-market siding. Sometimes, the twofer becomes a fourfer or fivefer when we go around the corner, under the porch, or up to the mansard roof.

The choice of material sometimes seems like a very conscious design decision—let’s do the first floor in blue stucco, she might say, yeah, and we’ll have white aluminum on the second floor, he joins in—but that doesn’t explain everything.

detail of residential wall showing fake brick siding underneath tiled siding — Bustin’ loose / drink the Kool-Aid. Elliott

Way too many of these examples seem like accidents of time, as if one set of homeowners made an initial decision and a subsequent owner came along and flipped the script twenty years later. Some just feel like people went with bargain lots on leftovers that couldn’t cover the entire house. We’ll likely never know why things ended up the way the did.

The photos—hopefully—speak for themselves and we don’t have enough puns on exterior cladding or Joni Mitchell in-jokes to warrant too much jibber-jabber. Enjoy.

back sides of several joined row houses — Once, twice, nine times a lady. Lawrenceville

row house with collection of different types of siding — The grand buffet! Bloomfield

house with many different styles of siding — An even grander buffet! Allentown

older brick house with modern facade additions in many styles — Ain’t that America: brick, wood, steel, and glass. Mt. Washington

house wall showing multiple siding materials — Rocks Bottoms mixer-upper. McKees Rocks

garage wall showing multiple siding materials — Triple layer cake. Bloomfield

set of three row houses in mid-renovation showing many layers of different siding types — Mid-renovation mixed-media. Bloomfield

three-story house with different styles of siding at each level — Three stories for three storeys. Millvale

pair of row houses with different types of siding on first and second floors — Bloofer-Twofer. Bloomfield

house with multiple patterns of siding — Business in the front … a different type of business around the side. West Homestead

small building with multiple siding materials in Donora, PA — Off off-white and stone below. Donora

pair of row houses where wall siding of one matches porch siding of the other — Your porch, my wall. Neighbors sharing siding. Bloomfield

wood fence constructed with many different pieces of scrap wood — “That used to be a crack house,” the neighbor told me. Mixed-media fencing, Beltzhoover

older apartment house with wood siding on the first floor and fish scale shingling on the second and third — Upstairs/downstairs. Polish Hill

newly-constructed row houses with "ghost house" cutting through the aluminum siding — The ghost in you. Mixed-media ghost house. Duryea, PA

large older row house with multiple types of siding — Mansard multi-layer. Bloomfield

small building with multiple siding materials in Pittsburgh, PA — Old school/new school. Hazelwood

large older building using multiple types of siding — Multi-sided multi-sidings. Bloomfield

Maybe It’s a Sign? Considering Mystery Signs

July 17, 2022Leave a comment

sign nailed to tree reading "Barber School?" — Pretty sure that’s *not* a barber school, but now we have to question everything. A mystery sign in Kilbuck Township

So many questions! One chunk of wood nailed to another is attached to the outside of a residential garage. Next to the wood hangs a length of braided twine with a sharp nail at the end. The wood is painted with a cryptic message: Its for my bac but by a man’s hand.

Bac may or may not have been cut off—or misspelled. Is it for the back? What is it—the nail on the string? Does this serve a real purpose—that’s hard to imagine—or is it entirely symbolic? Assuming the latter, the message is lost on me. Maybe it’s a Biblical or cultural reference your heathen author just doesn’t get?

It’s the very definition of a mystery sign—a public notice set out for the world to consume but not entirely clear what the message is or who it’s meant for.

small sign on cinderblock wall reading "It's for my bac... but by a man's hand." — “Its for my bac… but by a man’s hand.” The Run

large roadside sign saying "No quid pro quo" — “No quid pro quo.” Duquesne

With some signs the mystery may not be that great but they’re still worth review and inclusion. We may assume the No quid pro quo sign [photo above]—photographed in Duquesne during some of the former guy’s obvious quid pro quo activity—is the work of one of the ex-president’s supporters expressing an opinion … but it still looks way goofy absent any other context.

Anyone who travels Babcock Blvd. in the summer knows the corn guys by Hastings Hardware, but still, seeing a lone day-glow CORN SOON sign [below] just feels like a cruel taunt. Found glasses [below] suggests someone did exactly that … but not any way to return the lost item to its rightful owner.

Handmade sign on utility pole reading "Corn Soon" — But when will there be corn NOW? “CORN SOON.” North Hills

hand-written sign with drawing of eyeglasses and text "Found glasses" — “Found glasses.” Lawrenceville

sign in front yard with spray-painted message "Who is John Galt?" — I don’t know—you tell me! “Who is John Galt?” Stanton Heights

Others aren’t so obvious. Who is John Galt? [above] has an easily Googleable explanation, but it doesn’t explain why a Stanton Heights homeowner feels the need to decorate their front yard with this message.

A chain link fence in a Bloomfield alley hosts an odd specimen. No violins, the sign declares, along with a fine folksy painting of the instrument, no crying, no crying [below]. We like to think violins are purely metaphor here—that crying is the only real objection—but where’s that coming from? Not a creature was stirring when the picture was snapped, but perhaps it rains with teardrops of a thousand tortured toddlers at other times of day.

hand-painted sign with violin and text "No violins, no crying" — Cellos only. “No violins. No crying. No crying.” Bloomfield

hand-written sign in barber shop window reading "See you Tuesday Guess Why"" — You don’t want me guessing why. “See you Tuesday Guess ? Why.” Millvale

Every one of these gems has a story and it’s likely we won’t find out the explanations to any of them—and that’s OK. With the number of messages we humans push out to the world every single day, I’ll take mystery over hate, exploitation, cruelty, or narcissism any time. Wondering ain’t such a bad thing. Plus, like the sign says, … And that’s life … right?

Sign on utility pole reading "Street continues around corner." — Perhaps the most Pittsburgh sign ever. “Street continues around corner.” Troy Hill

hand-painted sign on utility pole reading "Slow kid playin" — “Slow kid playin.” Millvale

wooden board with cryptic symbols painted on it nailed to utility poles — Runes, Oakland

wooden sign nailed to utility pole with hand-painted message "CJ's Spot" — “CJ’s Spot.” Hill District

cardboard sign in window of home reading "Someone else removed the stop work order." — Sure they did. “Someone else removed the stop work order.” Spring Garden

hand-written sign in Zip-Loc bad stapled to utility pole — “Psalm 91 over this neighborhood.” North Side

mirror in front yard of home with message "Please do turn around here." — Vampires, you’re on your own. “Please do turn around here.” The Run

hand-written sign in barber shop window reading "Closed until Tuesday for court stuff" — “Closed until Tuesday for court stuff.” Millvale

handwritten sign in hot dog shop window reading "We are completely out of chili ... sorry." — If only every restaurant was as up front about their chili status. “We are completely out of chili … sorry.” Frankie’s, Lawrenceville

empty aluminum serving trays in deli display case with Post-It note reading "Not for consumption. Only for religion purpose." — “Not for consumption. Only for religion purpose.” Scranton

Handmade sign reading "JACK" — You don’t know Jack. “JACK.” Lawrenceville

color printout of cat stapled to utility pole — Cat, just a cat. Spring Garden

pair of doors in brick building, one of which has handmade sign reading "ACES" — “ACES.” Vandergrift

hand-painted sign on utility pole reading "NO OUTLET" — “NO OUT LET.” Millvale

white paper taped to cinderblock wall with no text remaining — A mystery [blank/sunbleached] sign among mystery signs! Lawrenceville

hand-written sign left by highway — “Sun Ra / Alice Coltrane. I miss my friends …” Millvale

handmade wooden sign with section missing attached to utility pole — What was here before the middle went missing? Polish Hill/Strip District

plastic butterfly and small sign reading "... and that's life" on cinderblock wall — It sure is. “… and that’s life.” The Run

Rust, White, and Blue: Flag Post 2022

July 4, 2022July 4, 20221 Comment

older camper trailer painted in red, white, and blue — Red, white, and blue camper, Dravosburg

If there is a best flag to represent America in 2022, it may well be this one. Fifteen or twenty feet tall, the big metal version of the stars & bars fills a huge section of exterior wall on the Dura-Bond Pipe facility in McKeesport.

The image is all there, but it’s seen better days. The blue field behind the flag’s fifty stars is faded and streaked; red stripes are all but gone entirely. In their void, scratchy, rusty striations seem to be eating Old Glory from the inside out.

large American flag on warehouse wall with red stripes faded — Rust, white, and blue. Warehouse flag, Dura-Bond Pipe, McKeesport

If that’s not a perfect analog for the current state of our American union, I don’t know what is. America is still here, we see its shape and form, still recognize its power and pretense, but it seems to be disappearing—or is actively being destroyed—right in front of our eyes, in ways we never imagined.

We’ll not do any great opining here—you’ve got blow-out mattress sales and sun-soaked cookouts to get to. Maybe, though, in between all those hot dogs and foul balls, consider what you can actively do—and not just on the Internet—to preserve American democracy between now and next Independence Day.

Enjoy the flags (and flag-like things). Happy Independence Day, y’all!